Cerberus Overdose......A Gungrave fansite

WWFD #74

Giving the gift of violence.

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(in this place.)

*Christmas Day, a tree is up in the corner*
Garino : Ok, you bastards. Get in here....and bring eggnog! I loves me some eggnog. It looks a lot like c--
Zell : Don't you say it, or else I'll go Bloody Omen on you!
Garino : You named your gun "Bloody Omen"?
Zell : It was in the official handbook.
Bunji : Speaking of which, why are we all here?
Garino : It's Christmas, dumbass. Why do you think we're all here?
Fangoram : PRESENTS!
Sherry : Hells yeah! Retard got it right, for once. Now, I wants my stuff.
Garino : Ok, ok. First, I'll give my gift....to my "father", Don.
Don : Garino, first off, none of your special mayo. Second off, no SEED. Third off, I don't want 25 minutes with Herb. Fourth off, I don't want 40 minutes with Herb.  Fifth off, I don't want that Hulk Hogan DVD....I'm not a real American, damn it! Sixth off....
Garino : SHut up! I didn't get you any of those...yet. I got you this.....
Don : A coupon? What the hell is this for?!?!
Garino : One day free at a sex club!
Don : I love you, son. Makes me feel bad I got you a CAPTAIN DO---
Garino : Cut it out, Dynite.
Don : *Freezes, turns into a statue.*
Sherry : Holy crap....his name is Dynite?!?!?!
Garino : Yes. I found it in the official book.....now availible from DarkHose.com. *Ding!*
Bunji : Does he stay like that?
Garino : Only for a few hours. Then he turns back to normal....
Zell : Well, I got Bunji something. Here you go, pal.
Bunji : Wow! It's the official storyline of how I came back! How'd you know?
Zell : Juji. And a hunch.
Bunji : Well, I'll be damned, he can do something right! Here Zell, I thought you'd appreciate this.
Zell : A New Liver! It's just what I wanted! The doctors said I'd never get another one after the first twelve, but.....*tearing up* I love you.
Bunji : I know.
Sherry : Well, I was going to get something to Harry....but he's dead. So I bought this for you Bunji.
Bunji : What is this?
Sherry : A restraining order. Stop staring at my boobs.
Bunji : Sherry, we work together.
Sherry : Ahh crap. Well, I got this for my Father too.
Bear : A restraining order?
Sherry : *rips up a slip of paper....* No....this.
Bear : An "I'm Bear Walken Shirt". No, dear, you shouldn't have. Really. I have, like, 12 of these. Well, here's your gift dear.
Sherry : The complete collection of Debbie Does the Dallas Lesbians? Daddy..... I LOVE YOU!.....wait, why is the security seal broken?
Bunji, Zell, Bear : Sorry.
Don : *turns back into normal* Sorry.....
Zell : Dynite!
Don : Son of a....*statue'd*
Zell : We have to use that more often now! At least three times a WWFD.
Grave : *taps him on shoulder, hands him gift.*
Grave : *opens.....gets Hulk Hogan DVDs.....* *tears up* *Tears off shirt, and poses.* .........................
Billy : If you don't stop singing the explicit version of "Real American", I will beat you down with the statue of....
Don : I'm back to normal again!
Billy : Dynite.
Don : Damn! *Statueed again.*
Juji : I got you this Billy.
Billy : Aww Juji, that's sweet. I can't open it though.
Juji : That's why I got you that. Bitch.
Billy : Bastard!
Juji : Here, it's an accustic guitar.
Billy : How am I supposed to kill people with it?
Spike : Start singing. I'm sure that will make people want to die.
Billy : Do you know what else it can be used for, Spike? El Kabong! *Smack*
Spike : SON OF A....
Mika : Spike, I got something for you too.
Spike : Sweet! It's a certificate stating that I'll get more than one appearence a year on this site!
Mika : Read the back of it.
Spike : Only valid in Utah?!?!
Mika : Gotcha!
Spike : Well, I got you this, Mika.
Mika : Is it a new mother?!?!?
Zell : Not likely, dear! I will say, she was a freak in the....
Bunji : That's good, Zell.
Sherry : But she was a freak in the....
Bear Walken : Go on...
Spike : HEY! I finally get a chance to speak! Let me have my time in the sun!
Mika : Not likely, now give me the present.
Spike : Damn.
Mika : A 5-pack! Who drank the other one?!?!
Zell : Now, that's a stupid question, isn't it, dear? Obviously it was.....
Don : Hey, back again!
Zell : Dynite!
Don : It was good to----*statue.*
Garino : Well, that's all we got. So, Merry Christmas everyone. And screw you.

Winnahs : The Baby Jesus, everyone.
Losahs : Don. Definately Don.

Back to WWFD

HX : Happy Holidays to everyone! Even the Jehova Witnesses. You know that you secretly celebrate it.
HB : Damn trippy, skippy. Merry Christmas to all, and all a good night.