Due to SC3, we are giving everyone the week off.....
....
Except Zell.
So enjoy.....
Playing the role of....
Don - Inferno
Garino - Siegfried Schtauffen (Pre-Nightmare)
Bunji : Raphael
Zell : Yoshimitsu (Zell : HEY! I'm still here!!!)
Fangoram : Astaroth
Sherry Walken : Cassandra
Sherry's Woman-of-the-day : Seung-Mina
Grave : Cervantes
Billy : Mitsurugi
Juji : Zell (Zell : HEY! Why do I have to play the blind, possibly Gay nazi!)
Juji (Really, since Zell is a bitch) : Voldo. Obviously, he won't be in it much.
Mika : Talim
Spike : Yunsung
Johnny Damon : Zell. (Finally! A good role!)
Bear Walken : Heihachi (What? He was in 2)
Pat Robertson : Necrid.
Harry : Ivy
____________________

Astaroth
Vs
Pat Robertson

_________________________________
Garino/Siegfried : Ok you bastards....OFFER YOUR SOULS!
Raphael/Bunji : You're not Nightmare anymore! And....NO GOOD!
Yoshimistsu/Zell : Whee! *Flying everywhere with that flag he has*
Cassandra/Sherry : *Claw* Get your ass down here.
Yoshimitsu : Where is the beer?!
Zell/Johnny : Beer, where? Wait......*Beer appears* It's good to be the Christ! *Does thumbs up* MATE!
Yoshi : REPENT! I Want some of that Fosters!!!
Raphael : You know.....I have this urge....to get completely shitfaced too! I won't allow you to get in my way!
Astaroth/Fangoram : ME WANT CHICKEN SELECTS!!!
Zell Damon : Wow, he sounds like the giant retard too....
Fangoram : I HEAR THAT!!!!!!!
Real Bunji : Get over here you moron! We're on vacation, and I'm not getting written into this!
Zell : Too late, mate.
Bunji : Damn....anyway....gone! *Drags Fangoram away*
Siegfried : Ok, we're being faced by....
Inferno : Hey Siegfried, I just screwed your mother!
Siegfried : Umm....who are you again? I didn't read the script too well....
Inferno : I'm the Don, your adoptive father, and leader of this mess we call a group.
Raphael : You're the leader? What the hell?
Yoshimitsu : I waaaaaaas tooold that there was going to be of the beeeeeeeeeer!
Zell : By the most sacred kangaroo, he fits the role perfectly! Except I don't clap with my feet and I can't teleport
around.
Yoshimitsu : Because you're gaaaaaay!
Raphael : The doctor Bunji says you are right. and where is my beer?
Zell : Hey, according to the writers on their message board, found at http://cerberusod.proboards58.com/index.cgi I was
the only straight one left.
Billy : Hey wait now! I'm straight here!
Bunji : Come on you idiots, we've got a plane to Trinidad and Tobago to catch....
Yoshimitsu : That exist? The fosters has lied to me again! *Slices fosters can*
Zell : *El Gaspo* You....sinner! How dare you defy the Fosters!
Raphael : It was empty....like your head.
Zell : .......Good enough.
Siegfried : Ok, we've got a mission.....I'm going to go sleep with that dead body....
Raphael : Wait....are you supposed to make some clever reference to having bestail sex with Herbert Hoover?
Siegfried : Well, I've lost all my humor, ok? I was freaking Nightmare for crap's sake.
Inferno : I wasn't going to do this, but....*Kicks Siegfried in the grion type place* THE POWER IS YOURS!
Raphael : Captain Inferno,
Yoshimitsu : He's our hero!
Zell : Going to take unfunny retards,
Cassandra : Down to zero!
Seung Mina : Yay!
Raphael : Where'd you come from?
Seung Mina : Umm......under.......Cassandra's skirt?
Zell : Wow, that was just as hot as that one time when Sherry...wait...i have the tapes in my car, I'll be right back.
Yoshimitsu : I shall assist in your suicide....err....in carring the tapes inside...
Siegfried : No...you won't....mission...kill Pat Robertson.....and put out the fire that surround my crotch...
Zell : No.
Raphael : No.
Yoshimitsu : No.
Cassandra : No.
Seung Mina : I'll put out Cassandra's fire, if you know what I mean....
Astaroth : MOSKAU MOSKAU! HA HA HA HA HA!
Zell : What does that mean Astaroth?
Raphael : It's French for shut the hell up.
Yoshimitsu : Ahhhaha! Snap!
Siegfried : Well, too bad...go kill the one that threatens to destroy humanity...
*Everyone pulls out weaponns and prepares to attach Siegfried*
Siegfried : Not me! I'm not Nightmare!
Cassandra : You sure? Last time you turned into Nightmare and threatened to destroy the whole world.
Raphael : Until some Frenchman stood up to you and stabbed your sword!
Siegfried : First off, That was Soul Calibur 2! We're in 3 now! Second, Raphael, I kicked your ass! And you face Talim
now for your destined battle!
Talim : Hey! I'm pretty damn good! I have that move that Terry Bogard had in Capcom Vs SNK 2!
Raphael : Rising Taco?
Yoshimitsu : I know Spanish..........taco.
Raphael and Yoshimitsu : Yeah! Politically incorrect! *Slam beers together*
Zell : Hey! I personally take offense to that racial slur! Being 0% Hispanic, I feel that I aught to be offended!
Raphael : But you're 0% Hispanic...
Zell : Correct Mate, now where's that beer?!?
Siegfried : No Drinkie, more killie! You're target is Pat Robertson!
Zell : What? Again?
Siegfried : Yeah, unfortunately, he's been re-incarnated as something so cheap, so cheap, so unoriginal....
Yoshimitsu : *Points to Astaroth*
Astaroth : Hey! I know not many English, But I know that I was just.....given the best compliment ever!
Siegfried : Umm...right. I meant Necrid. You know, the guy that everyone hated.
Raphael : Good. I hated him. All he did was just use a mixtures of our moves.
Yoshimitsu : *Jumping up and down, using sword as a pogo stick*
Siegfried : well, go now, so you can get back and I can all kick your ass in Tekken 5!
Zell : Wait....isn't that Yoshi guy in Tekken too?
Yoshimitsu : No, he's in the Mario Games. I'm in the Tekken and Soul Calibur series.....Whoo!
Raphael : Anyways, lets go, so we can watch those movies that Zell has...
Zell : *Holding stacks of tapes* They're all set. Lets go and kill us that retard.
Astaroth : Me no retard!
Zell : ....Right, you keep thinking that.
*At some Church-type rally thing*
Necrid : Rargh argle! Yarrbel!
Person in crowd : Wow, that is so true. And insightful. I should give him all my money!
Necrid : Rawrght?
Another person : Praise Jesus, for letting Bush be President!
Zell : Wait right there! As temporary Jesus, I have to say that he makes no sense, and is a complete bitch as a destined
battle.
Zasalamel : You got that right!
Raphael : Hey, get out of here! You weren't in 2!
Zasalamel : Aww...*leaves*
Yoshimitsu : Necrid, you shall pay for your crimes against the Soul Calibur fan community.
Raphael : And us! Don't forget us!
Yoshimitsu : I was getting to that!
Heihachi : I'm Bear Walken.
Zell : I thought you were Heihachi Mishima?
Heihachi : Well....shut up. Ha ha ha ha...
Ivy : Well, this is getting cheeky.
Zell : Speaking about cheeks, nice ass.
Ivy : Well, I work hard on them....
Yoshimitsu : Well, isn't it time to attack, or am I going to have to fly around again?
Raphael : Wait a minute...let me finish staring at her ass.......ok, lets go.
Necrid : Blargh wagga hummana?
Followers : Ohh....crap.
*SCENE DELETED DUE TO EXTREME SETSUKA REALLY SUCKS IN THE NEW GAME TYPE VIOLENCE*
Astaroth : CEEEERRRVAAANTEEEES!
Raphael : What?
Zell : Eh......close enough.
*At Disney World*
Cervantes : .................
Mitsurugi : Shut up Cervantes, that was just wrong. I'm sure Mickey Mouse and Goofy are not 'life partners'.
Voldo : *some sorta screeching noise*
Talim : That's not peaceful! And for the love of god, wear some damn clothes. No-one wants to see your ass cheeks.
Mitsurugi : But Ivy's on the other hand......
Cervantes : ..................
Mitsurugi : Cervantes, we all know that Yunseong takes it up the rectum.
Yunseong : Hey! What I do on my own free time is none of your buisness!
Talim : Not when you keep making the noises. Stuff like "Oh Kilik, oh Kilik!" That's just wrong.
______________________________________
WINNAHS! : YOSHIMITSU! RAPHAEL! INFERNO! ZELL! TALIM! MITSURUGI! ASTAROTH! SOUL CALIBUR FAN COMMUNITY! CASSANDRA! SEUNG
MINA!
LOSAHS! : NECRID! PEOPLE FOLLOWING HIM! ZELL! SIEGY! YUNSEONG!

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