Cerberus Overdose......A Gungrave fansite

WWFD #48 - The Soulcalibur 3 Special! What would Astaroth do?

In honor Soul Calibur 3's release date.....

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Due to SC3, we are giving everyone the week off.....


Except Zell.

So enjoy.....

Playing the role of....

Don - Inferno
Garino - Siegfried Schtauffen (Pre-Nightmare)
Bunji : Raphael
Zell : Yoshimitsu (Zell : HEY! I'm still here!!!)
Fangoram : Astaroth
Sherry Walken : Cassandra
Sherry's Woman-of-the-day : Seung-Mina
Grave : Cervantes
Billy : Mitsurugi
Juji : Zell (Zell : HEY! Why do I have to play the blind, possibly Gay nazi!)
Juji (Really, since Zell is a bitch) : Voldo. Obviously, he won't be in it much.
Mika : Talim
Spike : Yunsung
Johnny Damon : Zell. (Finally! A good role!)
Bear Walken : Heihachi (What? He was in 2)
Pat Robertson : Necrid.
Harry : Ivy




Pat Robertson



Garino/Siegfried : Ok you bastards....OFFER YOUR SOULS!

Raphael/Bunji : You're not Nightmare anymore! And....NO GOOD!

Yoshimistsu/Zell : Whee! *Flying everywhere with that flag he has*

Cassandra/Sherry : *Claw* Get your ass down here.

Yoshimitsu : Where is the beer?!

Zell/Johnny : Beer, where? Wait......*Beer appears* It's good to be the Christ! *Does thumbs up* MATE!

Yoshi : REPENT! I Want some of that Fosters!!!

Raphael : You know.....I have this urge....to get completely shitfaced too! I won't allow you to get in my way!

Astaroth/Fangoram : ME WANT CHICKEN SELECTS!!!

Zell Damon : Wow, he sounds like the giant retard too....

Fangoram : I HEAR THAT!!!!!!!

Real Bunji : Get over here you moron! We're on vacation, and I'm not getting written into this!

Zell : Too late, mate.

Bunji : Damn....anyway....gone! *Drags Fangoram away*

Siegfried : Ok, we're being faced by....

Inferno : Hey Siegfried, I just screwed your mother!

Siegfried : Umm....who are you again? I didn't read the script too well....

Inferno : I'm the Don, your adoptive father, and leader of this mess we call a group.

Raphael : You're the leader? What the hell?

Yoshimitsu : I waaaaaaas tooold that there was going to be of the beeeeeeeeeer!

Zell : By the most sacred kangaroo, he fits the role perfectly! Except I don't clap with my feet and I can't teleport around.

Yoshimitsu : Because you're gaaaaaay!

Raphael : The doctor Bunji says you are right. and where is my beer?

Zell : Hey, according to the writers on their message board, found at http://cerberusod.proboards58.com/index.cgi I was the only straight one left.

Billy : Hey wait now! I'm straight here!

Bunji : Come on you idiots, we've got a plane to Trinidad and Tobago to catch....

Yoshimitsu : That exist? The fosters has lied to me again! *Slices fosters can*

Zell : *El Gaspo* You....sinner! How dare you defy the Fosters!

Raphael : It was empty....like your head.

Zell : .......Good enough.

Siegfried : Ok, we've got a mission.....I'm going to go sleep with that dead body....

Raphael : Wait....are you supposed to make some clever reference to having bestail sex with Herbert Hoover?

Siegfried : Well, I've lost all my humor, ok? I was freaking Nightmare for crap's sake.

Inferno : I wasn't going to do this, but....*Kicks Siegfried in the grion type place* THE POWER IS YOURS!

Raphael : Captain Inferno,

Yoshimitsu : He's our hero!

Zell : Going to take unfunny retards,

Cassandra : Down to zero!

Seung Mina : Yay!

Raphael : Where'd you come from?

Seung Mina : Umm......under.......Cassandra's skirt?

Zell : Wow, that was just as hot as that one time when Sherry...wait...i have the tapes in my car, I'll be right back.

Yoshimitsu : I shall assist in your suicide....err....in carring the tapes inside...

Siegfried : No...you won't....mission...kill Pat Robertson.....and put out the fire that surround my crotch...

Zell : No.

Raphael : No.

Yoshimitsu : No.

Cassandra : No.

Seung Mina : I'll put out Cassandra's fire, if you know what I mean....


Zell : What does that mean Astaroth?

Raphael : It's French for shut the hell up.

Yoshimitsu : Ahhhaha! Snap!

Siegfried : Well, too bad...go kill the one that threatens to destroy humanity...

*Everyone pulls out weaponns and prepares to attach Siegfried*

Siegfried : Not me! I'm not Nightmare!

Cassandra : You sure? Last time you turned into Nightmare and threatened to destroy the whole world.

Raphael : Until some Frenchman stood up to you and stabbed your sword!

Siegfried : First off, That was Soul Calibur 2! We're in 3 now! Second, Raphael, I kicked your ass! And you face Talim now for your destined battle!

Talim : Hey! I'm pretty damn good! I have that move that Terry Bogard had in Capcom Vs SNK 2!

Raphael : Rising Taco?

Yoshimitsu : I know Spanish..........taco.

Raphael and Yoshimitsu : Yeah! Politically incorrect! *Slam beers together*

Zell : Hey! I personally take offense to that racial slur! Being 0% Hispanic, I feel that I aught to be offended!

Raphael : But you're 0% Hispanic...

Zell : Correct Mate, now where's that beer?!?

Siegfried : No Drinkie, more killie! You're target is Pat Robertson!

Zell : What? Again?

Siegfried : Yeah, unfortunately, he's been re-incarnated as something so cheap, so cheap, so unoriginal....

Yoshimitsu : *Points to Astaroth*

Astaroth : Hey! I know not many English, But I know that I was just.....given the best compliment ever!

Siegfried : Umm...right. I meant Necrid. You know, the guy that everyone hated.

Raphael : Good. I hated him. All he did was just use a mixtures of our moves.

Yoshimitsu : *Jumping up and down, using sword as a pogo stick*

Siegfried : well, go now, so you can get back and I can all kick your ass in Tekken 5!

Zell : Wait....isn't that Yoshi guy in Tekken too?

Yoshimitsu : No, he's in the Mario Games. I'm in the Tekken and Soul Calibur series.....Whoo!

Raphael : Anyways, lets go, so we can watch those movies that Zell has...

Zell : *Holding stacks of tapes* They're all set. Lets go and kill us that retard.

Astaroth : Me no retard!

Zell : ....Right, you keep thinking that.

*At some Church-type rally thing*

Necrid : Rargh argle! Yarrbel!

Person in crowd : Wow, that is so true. And insightful. I should give him all my money!

Necrid : Rawrght?

Another person : Praise Jesus, for letting Bush be President!

Zell : Wait right there! As temporary Jesus, I have to say that he makes no sense, and is a complete bitch as a destined battle.

Zasalamel : You got that right!

Raphael : Hey, get out of here! You weren't in 2!

Zasalamel : Aww...*leaves*

Yoshimitsu : Necrid, you shall pay for your crimes against the Soul Calibur fan community.

Raphael : And us! Don't forget us!

Yoshimitsu : I was getting to that!

Heihachi : I'm Bear Walken.

Zell : I thought you were Heihachi Mishima?

Heihachi : Well....shut up. Ha ha ha ha...

Ivy : Well, this is getting cheeky.

Zell : Speaking about cheeks, nice ass.

Ivy : Well, I work hard on them....

Yoshimitsu : Well, isn't it time to attack, or am I going to have to fly around again?

Raphael : Wait a minute...let me finish staring at her ass.......ok, lets go.

Necrid : Blargh wagga hummana?

Followers : Ohh....crap.



Raphael : What?

Zell : Eh......close enough.

*At Disney World*

Cervantes : .................

Mitsurugi : Shut up Cervantes, that was just wrong. I'm sure Mickey Mouse and Goofy are not 'life partners'.

Voldo : *some sorta screeching noise*

Talim : That's not peaceful! And for the love of god, wear some damn clothes. No-one wants to see your ass cheeks.

Mitsurugi : But Ivy's on the other hand......

Cervantes : ..................

Mitsurugi : Cervantes, we all know that Yunseong takes it up the rectum.

Yunseong : Hey! What I do on my own free time is none of your buisness!

Talim : Not when you keep making the noises. Stuff like "Oh Kilik, oh Kilik!" That's just wrong.





Back to the WWFD's....

HX : Well, I have to say this....Abyss is a complete pain in the ass.

HB : I'm inclined to agree, but remember, he is the final boss. Remember Jinpachi in Tekken 5.....oh wait, you suck in Tekken. Never mind.

HX : Remember the time when I smacked you? *Smacks HB* Goooood times....

HB : Hardy Har Har. At least I boast a winning record against you in every fighting game we've ever competed in. Including being undefeated in Tekken 5 and Soul Calibur 3. Bitch.

HX : OK, that settles it.....Soul Calibur 2...right now! 3 on 3 right now....perv.