HB : I'm doing something a little different here. I was watching the Scrubs episode "My Musical," and was brutally beaten
with an idea when the song "Guy Love" came on. So, two Gungrave characters - who, for one reason or another, are friends -
will sing about their close friendship.
And I promise, it isn't Bunji and Zell.
Story begins NOW
_______________
*Bear Walken walks out of a room at the Millenion Headquarters*
Bear : Listen up everybody! Circle it up, bring it in nice and tight.
*Everyone in the area gathers around Bear*
Bear : As you all know, I'm prone to picking up on other people's mistakes, but, I have a daughter now, and I have come
to realize that it is important to recognize when someone does something right. Big Daddy's beloved Maria complained about
hearing everyone around her singing, like some sort of musical, and was thought to just be bonkers. But SOMEONE bothered to
get her a CAT scan, and found a massive aneurysm near her temporal lobe. Now, some of you may think this is a silly excercise,
but I want that person to step forward, and put your hand in the air so the group can recognize your great good work.
*No one steps forward*
Bear : This is no time to be modest! Come now...
*Bear raises his own hand*
Bear : Oh my God! IT WAS ME! I did it! I'm a genius. I'm a huge brain in a ripped up body! I'm Jesus H. Bear Walken,
M.D.
*Group looks uncomfortable*
Bear : Still, I couldn't have done this all by myself, so I would like to recognize the other 'players' involved. First,
there was the assistant who misjudged the patient....
Balladbird Lee : That's me daddy!
Harry : Hands down, Lee.
Bear : And then there was the member of the Family who confirmed that misjudgement....
Harry : In my defense, I was planning my complete coup d'etat of the Family.
Bear : And last, but not least, there was the other member of the Family who wanted to put her out of her misery! He's
too modest to introduce himself to the group, so allow me. He is so quiet. He is so loyal. And he can't eat cupcakes because
he has diabetes, ladies and gentlemen, Brandon Heat.
Brandon : Can we just get back to work, sir...
Bear : NOT until people start chanting my name so I can exit the room with my hands held high above my head in a victorious
gesture, because this killing machine, this fabulous thing...no, it runs on props. So, I'm going to need to hear it...come
now...
*People chant 'BEAR WALKEN' over and over*
Bear : Me! Me! Me! SO Me! *Exits the room.*
Brandon : Harry, I'm going to go in there to apoligize to Maria for....offering to kill her.
Harry : But...why?!?! I mean, she's the one who digs old man balls!
Brandon : Still, it is a matter of duty...*Walks into Maria's room....*
Harry : But Brandon! *Runs in after him....*
*They Break into SONG~!*
Harry : Let's face the facts about me and you...a love unspecified! Though, I'm proud to call you Grave-y bear, the crowds
will always talk and stare...
Brandon : I feel exactly these feelings too, and that's why I keep them inside! 'Cause this bear, can't bear the world's
disdain, and sometimes, it's easier to hide...
Brandon and Harry : ...than explain our Guy Love! That's all it is! Guy Love, he's mine, I'm his! There's nothing gay
about in our eyes!
Brandon : You ask me 'bout these things we share...
Harry : ...and he tenderly replies...
Brandon : It's Guy Love...
Brandon and Harry : Between two guys!
*Brandon walks over to Maria's bed, who looks completely confused...*
Brandon : We're closer than your average man and wife...
Harry : That's why our matching bracelets say "Brandon and Harry!" *They show Maria the bracelets*
Brandon : You know I'll stick by you for the rest of my life...
Harry : You're the only man who's been inside of me!!!
Brandon : Whoa...I just took out a bullet from his arm...
*Maria gives the "I Understand" nod*
Harry : There's no need to clarify...
Brandon : Oh no?
Harry : Just let it grow more and more each day...it's like I married my best friend...
Brandon : But in a totally manly way!
Brandon and Harry : Let's Go! It's Guy Love, don't compromise, the feelings of some other guys, holding up your heart
into the sky...
Harry : I'll be there to care in all the lows...
Brandon : I'll be there to share the highs....
Brandon and Harry : ...it's Guy Love between two guys...
Harry : And when I say "I love you Brandon", I'll still shoot you in the eye....
Brandon : It's Guy Love...between....twoooo....guys....
*They hug, and leave....Big Daddy walks in*
*THEY SING!~"
Maria : That was weird dear....
Big Daddy : No dearrr....it is completely normal. I mean, I have the name Jester tattooed on my butt.
Maria : Why?
Big Daddy : We were in the war together. If you went through what we did, you'd understand....
*END!*
