Cerberus Overdose......A Gungrave fansite

Writing the Book of Love, with Zell and Bunji

Take, these broken wings....

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Obviously, Mr. Farber. You didn't know about Bunji and Zell.


Bunji : Zell, this has to be the dumbest idea you have ever done! Are you drunk?

Zell : Why do you ask questions you already know the answer to?

Bunji : Good point. I guess to make myself feel more important. Boosts the self-esteem.

Zell : Oh. I didn't know. Anyway, we should probably start writing the greatness that will be our novel.

Bunji : Just because you were inspired by those two teenage twin brothers who wrote a book, and actually got it published.

Zell : Yeah. So, in my drunken rage, I made a sammich. After that, I got this idea to write a book, and include you, because I can't do anything by myself. I'm so co-dependent.

Bunji : Yes you are. But Zell, don't you know how hard it is to write a book? I mean, it takes years of dedication. It takes a lot of money too. And do you have any of that sammich left? I'm starving.

Zell : I think there might be some left, but we have to wait until after the cameos for that.

Don : I'm Don.

Johnny Damon : I'm Jesus.

Sherry : *Bust making out with Maria*

Zell : I'm Zell.

Bunji : You're in this one, you moron!

Juji : I'm not wearing pants!

Bunji : Ok, I think we got them all.


Zell : Ok, now I think that's the last...

Mika : Tentacle porn, mate!

Bunji : I said I think we have all the cameos!

Herb : ...

Bunji : No!

Herb : ....Aww...

Bunji : Alright, now, since it was your idea to write a book Zell, what the hell were you thinking it should be about?

Zell : I was thinking....epic love story. Set in the ancient days, between this guy named Zellucles, who was a an epic soldier, and this woman Bunjilena, who was a poor servant girl for the king. And in the end, their nightwish to be together would come true. In Finland.

Bunji : ......Hold on, I need to see if my brain still works after that......nope.....wait, yep, it's still there, and in pain. Lots, and lots of pain.

Zell : I knew you would say that. Isn't it awesome?

Bunji : Why the hell is the female named Bunjilena? That's kind of....not cool.

Zell : Why? You think because it's....gay!

Bunji : No, not really. Just hellaretarded.

Zell : So, are you not a fan of epic love stories?

Bunji : It's not that I'm not a fan, it's the fact that I'm not a complete moron. So how about no.

Zell : Aww....damn. Well, so, no love stories?

Bunji : Ok....we'll do the love story, but for the love of Ra, I'll rename these people.

Zell : Alright mate, works for me. Let's call it, "Ghostbusters".

Bunji : I don't think that would fly all to well with Bill Murray. How about, "Epic Love Maneuver"?

Zell : I think that may just be the best name ever. But can the main characters be women?

Bunji : Dear lord yes!

Zell : Alright! Let's get writing. And by "let's", I mean you, while I supply the alcohol.

Bunji : I don't know how you make me do this, but one day, I'll get my revenge.

Zell : Shut it and get writing, worker monkey.

*Two hours later*

Zell : So Bunji, how much have we gotten done?

Bunji : About three cases of Fosters.

Zell : Awesome, keep up the work!

*Ten hours later*

Zell : So Bunji, have we written anything?

Bunji : Hmm....let me check...no. Hand me another beer, and let me see if anything appears then.

*Two months later*

Zell : So Bunji, how much do we have written?

Bunji : Well, so far, we have this, "I don't want the world, I just want your half."

Zell : Awesome! We're nearly done!

*Half hour later*

Bunji : Done! Three hundred pages of drunken literature is complete!

Zell : *Peeing on the the tree in the corner* Alright! Now we can go to the publisher! And hopefully there they'll have a bathroom.

Bunji : Umm, Zell? We have a bathroom here too.

Zell : Yeah, but it's currently occupied by Herb and Garino, so like Hell I'm using that anytime soon.

Bunji : God point. Remind me to not go in there until we make Sherry clean it out.

*At the Publishers*

Zell : Alright Mr. Publisher, we have here for you our epic love maneuver, simply titled "Epic Love Maneuver".

Bunji : Yeah, it's written completely with the passion of our souls, and the influence of beer and wine coolers.

Publisher : .....O....K...let me see what it looks like. Umm....every other sentence reads "I am so fecking boozed up right now".

Zell : Yeah, that's the wine coolers talking there.

Publisher : Yeah...we're going to have to edit this. Come back in about two weeks, ok?

Zell : Alright, that'll about be the same time we sober up.

*Two weeks later*

Bunji : Alright, how does it look?

Publisher : Well, if you take away all of the alcohol references, it's quite possibly the finest work of art ever!

Zell : Wait, you took out all the references? Can you slip in a few of them?

Publisher : No.

Bunji : Just one?

Publisher : In the Author's note.

Bunji : I think we have a deal.

Zell : Can we have the ink be made with beer?

Publisher : I don't think that is even possible.

Zell : Well, you work on publishing that, I'll work on the beer/ink hybrid.

*20 minutes later*

Mansion : *In fire*

Zell : Well, who knew that the two were so combustible?

Bunji : You learn something new every day.

Zell : Well, maybe I shouldn't have drinkened it. That's where the trouble started. I was peeing fire, literally. I mean, I never knew that fire could shoot out of my winky dink.

Bunji : I could have gone without having to hear that. But hey, the publisher called and said that it's fresh off the printers. We have a book signing this Saturday.

Zell : All right! Hopefully we'll become rich and maybe find some ladies there too.

*At the Book signing*

Zell : Hello? Is there anyone there that wants to buy or books? Hello?

Bunji : Zell, we've got a crowd of people here at our booth. Get out of the employee bathroom and you'll see them.

Zell : Hey, there were no urinals in there.

Bunji : I think it was the female bathroom...wait, sorry, never mind. You were in the shemale bathroom.

Zell : Wow...there's a new one. It did smell like roses though.


Bunji : You know Zell, It's near the end of this episode, and we haven't destroyed anything yet. You thinking what I'm thinking?

Zell : Alcohol and guns?

Bunji : Damn straight.



"Epic Love Maneuver" became a best seller, and was a part of the Oprah Book Club. It has sold over a million copies, and is currently being translated into Greek, Ancient Babylonian, Robotic, Farsi, and 37 other languages.

People with brains are still trying to figure out how the hell those two actually wrote a book. Hell, we're surprised that either of them are literate.

The creators are currently working on a sequel, called "I Have a Hard On". Dear Lord, help us all.